I want to share something that’s a little fresh, maybe even a little raw for me.
It’s not some great thing I discovered 10 years ago, or 5, or even 1—that I can share from an oh-so-wise place.
This is happening right now.
One of the things that I thought I’d tamed were the tapes in my head that would tell me I was ridiculous, weird, incompetent, wrong, lame… You know the ones.
I really thought I’d licked them and fully embraced loving and accepting myself.
I’d upgraded the messages about following my own path and speaking my truth and all that stuff, but very recently I realized how often I judge what I feel in my body and try to shut it down.
You feel lots of sensations when you’re highly sensitive + observant + an empath.
Feeling is kind of all you do.
But I’ve been dissing my neurological system for ages it turns out. Telling myself, those sensations are wrong, stop feeling that way, no one else finds this hard, you’re weird for feeling all this stuff, just deal.
The thing is, truly loving yourself doesn't just mean loving the parts you like—it means loving all the parts, even the ones you're working on.
I realized I needed to find some times/spaces to observe all the sensations and not suppress or judge them.
Yesterday morning at yoga I drew a card before class from one of the decks of oracle cards. It was linked with sensuality—relating to the perception of things through the body—and I paid attention. Those signs and reminders happen for a reason, after all.
I decided to use my yoga practice to observe through my senses without shutting anything down.
This whole thing may sound weird, but stay with me.
There was so much sensory stuff going on: tingling in my fingertips, muscles that tightened and cramped, energy flowing across my face like a piece of soft fabric—I could even feel the blood pumping through my arms as I lifted them above my head and brought my sweaty palms together.
And gratitude. So much gratitude I felt like my heart might burst.
I was in awe that these kinds of sensations are going on all the time for me, not just when I take the time to keenly observe.
My big aha was that I want to be in a state of amazement, love, and gratitude for my highly attuned senses, to love even the parts of myself that sometimes annoy me, and to end the messages of STOP THAT, YOU’RE WEIRD, ENOUGH WITH THE SENSITIVITY ALREADY.
I'm focusing on embracing all the ways I experience sensory stimulation and appreciating how incredible my neurological system is.
And I'm replacing those negative messages with this simple mantra: ALL SENSATIONS ARE ACCEPTABLE.
It's definitely a work in progress.
This topic is a little messy and unpolished because I want to convey that even when you’ve done lots of personal work, there’s always another level of growth. And there's always more you can learn about yourself and love more deeply.
My question to you is this: Are you willing to get a little messy and shake things up? Growth and insight don’t happen when you stay in your comfort zone and keep things that same.
It happens when you take a step into the unknown, toward your truth. When you suspend those negative messages for a minute—the ones that tell you (wrongly) that you’re not worthy or deserving of better—and take a small leap of faith.
If you're ready to explore this further, use the contact page and let me know.
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